My students loved it when I graded on the curve. As a teacher, I accepted that if no one got a perfect score on the test, then a little adjustment was required. Consider it “educational grace.” No one wants to learn in the “school of hard knocks.” I acknowledge that sometimes I’ve been badly bruised by lessons learned the hard way. The truths we learn from our hardest falls are often the ones that help us the most.  

I spent seventeen years in a high school classroom. As the years progressed, I became more and more lenient. A note from Mom meant you got an extra day to finish your homework. I started grading student work in pencil, rather than bleeding in red all over their words and hearts.

Life will either soften you to the humanity in others, or you become jaded and untractable.

I want to be a sponge, not a rock. I want to be a safe place to land, not a stumbling block.

God has softened me to the brokenness in others by providing me some painful “field trips.” Over the last 9 years, I’ve experienced miscarriage, sickness, and depression. I’ve grieved the loss of loved ones, and I’ve walked with those who are grieving.

I’ve hit rock bottom and found that God is still there.

Learning is a gift… even when pain is your teacher. I am so thankful that my God writes in pencil and that He understands my weakness. I am thankful that God provides a learning curve of grace.

I am a work in progress. You are a work in progress. God is not finished teaching us yet, and we have much to learn still.

As an ongoing student enrolled in the School of Hard Knocks, I’ve come to understand that I need to play well with others. I have an enemy, but he is not flesh and blood. My “schoolmates” are fighting hard to make it through each day, and my job is to encourage, to pray, to listen, and to refrain from judgment.

Teaching cured me of “perfectionism.” I’ve learned that rules are meant to give you structure, but you also need to be a little flexible. It’s okay to color outside the lines sometimes.

I am going to make mistakes. You are going to make mistakes. Your best teacher may just be your last mistake. Mistakes are just unexpected learning experiences. Pain and sorrow and failure are portals to discovery.

Maybe you have a failed marriage or a prodigal child. Perhaps you’ve lost your dream job or lost a valuable friendship. We’ve all learned the hard way, and let’s just acknowledge that it really hurts.  

As I’ve surrendered my brokenness to the Master Teacher, I’ve learned to a few heart lessons….and today I want to share them with you. Maybe this will encourage you if you are in a hard place.

3 Life Lessons Learned the Hard Way

Cultivate thankfulness.

Today is a gift. Hebrews 12:15 encourages me to “keep a sharp eye out for weeds of bitter discontent.” A heart of gratitude is a teachable heart.

Choose to love and forgive.

I’ve learned to let go of my expectations and and allow others room to be human. I Peter 4:8 reminds me: “Love each other as if your life depended on it. Love makes up for practically anything.”

Cooperate with others humbly, rather than give in to selfish comparison.

I want to be a grace giver who learns from the stories of others. Romans 12:17 & 18 in The Message challenge: “Don’t hit back; discover beauty in everyone. If you’ve got it in you, get along with everybody. Don’t insist on getting even; that’s not for you to do.”

Maybe you’ve been holding on to your red pen for too long, and you need to pick up your pencil. Who do you need to extend grace to today?

Maybe you think you are failure because of your mistakes. Listen to the gentle voice of your Teacher. There is grace for you. He is not finished with you yet.

May this be our prayer as we sit in God’s schoolroom and listen up: “Show me how You work, God, school me in Your ways.” Psalm 25:4, MSG

So, here is your homework for this week:

1.  Write out Psalm 25:4 or grab the free printable graphic from the Faith Fuel Library. Post it on your fridge or computer screen or bathroom mirror — somewhere. where you will see it and remember.
2. Spend a few minutes each morning this week inviting God to teach you. Tell Him you are ready and willing to learn. Read a short passage in the Bible with pen in hand. (Suggestion: Proverbs is a good place to turn if you are in need of wisdom. Today is the 17th — Read Proverbs 17.)
3. At the close of your day, set aside a few minutes to sit quietly before the Lord. Grab a cup of coffee or tea and sit in a comfy chair thinking over your day and asking the Holy Spirit to teach you. If you have a notebook or journal, keep it close by with your favorite pen just in case you want to record a nugget of wisdom.
4. Close your time of reflection in prayer. Place your hands in your lap with palms open and up ready to receive. Surrender you day to the Lord. Tell Him you are listening.

Want to go even deeper and pray big?

I’m sharing a copy of My Pray Big Prayer Calendar with you. Sign up today as a member of the Wildfire Faith Community and  grab a copy in our Faith Fuel Library. Print out your copy and start each morning inviting God to strengthen your step and breathe fresh wind into your weary spirit.  

Lessons learned the hard way help us to grow, and then one day we get to give back.  We will see someone struggling with the same thing we’ve already walked through, and we can turn to them and let them know they are going to be okay. We can say, “God got me through, and you are going to come through this stronger.”  

Lessons learned the hard way can bring healing.  

Let’s Chat: Have you experienced lasting life change from lessons learned the hard way?

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